Wedding planning counts as a job, right?

Oy vey! I have ten months and 3 days until my wedding... it seems like just yesterday that I had over a whole year to go!

I AM NOT READY! I am freaking out like crazy on everyone (Mom, sister, and fiancé)! We are allowed to be bridezillas the ENTIRE time we plan.... right?

Well, so far we only have the venue selected (and deposit... deposited?) and our colors (mint green, dark and light grey, hunter green, ivory). According to theknot.com, we do not have enough things planned (oh shit, oh shit, oh shit). But here is where the problem lies... we don't have save the dates sent out, we don't know how many people are coming to the wedding, and we are on a VERY limited budget of $5,000. SO, theknot.com, please tell me how I am supposed to have a contract with the caterer, talk to florists, AND discuss details with the officiant?! AH!

In lieu of the $25,000 an average wedding costs in the US (this is so ridiculous, I want to cry at that number) my fiancé, Ben, and I are planning on making this wedding a very DIY and intimate affair.
We don't have a specific theme in mind which may or may not be helpful in decorating the venue. I do have some ideas that Pinterest (GOD BLESS THAT WEBSITE, seriously how did anyone plan a wedding without it?!) and amazing blogs have given me. I guess I should count my blessings because my Abuela is a seamstress (which should help with wedding dress making) and my Mama is very crafty/clever. These women should prove to be very useful.

So far what I have in my head is:
-Burlap and lace table cloths
-Colored glass dinnerware from local thrift stores
-Champagne coupes (because what I really want out of life is to party like Marie Antoinette)
-Scallop buntings and tissue buntings in our wedding colors
-twinkling string lights to accompany the buntings
-Seattle roasted coffee as wedding favors, in screen printed burlap sacs
-Homemade dessert table filled with cupcakes, pies, macarons, macaroons, alfajores, lemon squares, etc. (again - party like it's 1779)
-Delicious food (who knows what kind right now... DIY pizza? hamburgers?)
-Votive and tea light candle holders with sequins and ribbons

Somehow these seem trivial to the actual wedding reception... I don't know what to do from here!
We don't really plan on having more than 45 people attend (we just moved to Seattle and most of our guests will have to travel from Texas, Kansas, Venezuela, etc.- aka we aren't holding our breath for a ton of people!) but I really don't think we can plan catering if we don't have the official number of guests... right? UGH!

I can barely think straight... I think it is because I am still traumatized from last night's episode of Downton Abbey!!! Here I am watching the show/working out and then.... SYBIL IS DEAD. WTF! NOOOOOO!!!! It was the worst episode ever!

I will continue my rant in a while... after I've made my brain turn to mush by watching Pretty Little Liars!!!

The List- 2013

I am 26 days behind, but I am finally making my 2013 list.

The past six months have truly been an emotional roller coaster for me (which is incredibly hard to deal with in a new city with no friends). This list is my way of telling the universe, "SHUT UP! I am in control... sort of."

My wishes for 2013:
-Plant a bee garden: I've been wanting to do this since 2008, but I have never had the amount of time I have now.

-Have an exciting and stress-free wedding: This truly is a wish since I have no idea how this mess will turn out!

-Sew my own wedding dress: I am a novice but so determined to make this happen.

-Make friends in Seattle: This is my new home, so I better make the most of it!

-Gain confidence: Everyone here is Seattle skinny (not too skinny but somehow super healthy and in shape) and I want to be able to walk by a Seattleite and not feel insecure about myself!

-Train my dogs: My babies know basic commands (one more than the other) but they are SO spoiled. I want to push myself to teach them that I am the pack leader and their boss (right now they are my bosses).

-Keep in touch with my family: This doesn't seem like a hard thing to do.... I mean, pick up the phone and dial, right? Well, I am such a weird state of mind that I find my station in life so meaningless that I don't even want to bother people with what I haven't been doing (also, sadness and anger rubs off on others and I want everyone happy) which leads to...

-Be happy: This one may be my hardest challenge. I am so focused on what I don't have that I ALWAYS overlook what I do have: my health, my fiancé, my pups, my cat, my family, my God, etc. We will see if this is another cynical year for me!



Let's get this blog started, citags.

-VEM